Ranking All The Vincent Price Sketches From Worst To Best

This blog entry is a companion piece to the latest episode of the "We Heart Hader" podcast out now. Give us a listen, won't you?

6. Halloween Special 1960 - Jon Hamm/Rihanna (10.30.2010) 

• This is definitely the weakest of all the Vincent Price sketches. You can tell it's running on fumes creatively. The skeleton puppet was a fun opening though (probably the best thing about this one).

• This is officially nothing but repeated impressions at this point because besides Armisen's Liberace, we get Wiigs’ Judy Garland (same solid impression, more drug jokes that seem lazier and lead to an out of nowhere “putting a man on the moon” joke) and Hamms’ JFK (which we only saw a brief glimpse of last time he hosted in the Obama Variety Special sketch but we could've seen his unused Dean Martin impression instead).

• JFK + Liberace = Double the sex jokes (almost nothing but, at least Hader adds some self awareness to them as Armisen delivers one liners at a Merv The Perv like pace).

• It's official. Fred Armisens’ Liberace has officially become “Flanderized”.

• This was the last Vincent Price sketch that made it to air, which at least means they knew the exact right time to end these.

5. Christmas Special 1954 - James Franco/Muse (12.19.2009)

• The smoke machine gag is pretty weak. Haders’ still the strongest part of these but something officially feels “off” with these starting here.

• While we are officially repeating previously used impressions here, that's not the main problem. Wiigs’ Katherine Hepburn is more fine tuned here. The gag with her bringing a freshly cut tree to the studio and killing a live racoon she found in it (but not before it bit her and infected her with rabies) might have been my favorite part of this. 

• James Franco as James Dean is definitely one of those things that sounds better on paper. He's too raspy for…really anyone to be able to tell how good the impression is (which seems to just be posing and pouting for him because the voice and general vibe from him just appears to be “fey, repressed vaguely southern guy”)

• The implied fellatio at the end is the official “tipping point” I mentioned earlier and officially marks the point when cheap gay jokes just overtook these all together (and given that James Franco is involved makes these age just badly enough to be included in the SNL50 “In Memoriam” montage).

4. St. Patrick's Day Special 1961 - Matt Dillon/Arctic Monkeys (03.11.2006)

• Vincent still tries to “spookify” St. Patrick's Day, tracing it back to ancient druid rituals. Bill still anchors this flawlessly in his first season alone.

• Darrell Hammond's flabbergasted Don Knotts/Barney Fife is surprisingly strong right out of the gate. It was rare in this era for him to be used to this great of an effect in a non political role.

• Kristen Wiigs’ Kathryn Hepburn isn't as strong as her Judy Garland but she sells it on sheer energy alone.

• The “bagpipers drown out Vincent” gag could've been executed better.

• Matt Dillon does a solid Rod Serling. His and Vincents’ passive aggressive comments toward each other were a great note to end this on.

3. Thanksgiving Special 1958 - Eva Longoria/Korn (11.19.2005)

• This is the first and longest Vincent Price sketch of then all clocking in at 07:24 and somehow feels the most low-key. It's about two minutes longer than the others. It's understandable why these would be tightened up a bit in the future.

• This is a very strong, very funny debut for this series of sketches. It's extremely well performed by all involved. 

• Vincent Price seems to have the easiest time getting the show under control in this one. I got a kick out of his attempts to “horrify” and “Halloweenize” Thanksgiving (feasting on a decapitated fowl, his stumbling over the line “naked, blood soaked manbeasts feasted on the entrails of…peasant children” may have been him just getting over Lornes' “why now?” moment, stating it came from either a bizarre pagan ritual or the pilgrims making it up, giving up and admitting he doesn't know much about Thanksgiving because he only went to a small school with three other guys and then dramatically stating “NEVERTHELESS!”)

• Sanz does a surprisingly strong Alfred Hitchcock. Hammond doesn't get much as Clark Gable but he's pretty solid. Wiig especially shines as Judy Garland (even though this sketch seems to mine most of it's laughs from Garlands’ drug problem).

• Still, one of my favorite gags in this is the “most doctors recommend Chesterfields” from Amy Poehler (not that far off from a real ‘50s cigarette commercial, by the way) followed by Hader’s exclamation of “who the hell makes 12 second cigarette commercials?”

• Personally, I would have cut Armisen and Longorias’ parts. I can see why getting to perform in these roles in these sketches would be a big deal to them but their Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz (or as Vincent calls him “America's favorite illegal immigrant”) impressions weren't quite there yet. 

2. Valentines Day Special 1966 - Alec Baldwin/Jonas Brothers (02.14.2009)

• Yeah, an episode with The Jonas Brothers as musical guest during the height of their Disney teeny bopper period was definitely the ideal episode to air this sketch in. Even though they're not in this sketch, these old Hollywood film references are definitely gonna land with the JoBro fans who are definitely still gonna be up by the time this airs. Anyway, moving on…

• The revolving bookcase gag is OK, but doesn't play as well as the scissor lift. Hader is still the “glue” of these, but we've officially lost his attempts to “horrify” each holiday with this iteration.

• Alecs’ Richard Burton is OK but Wiigs’ Carol Channing is quite stellar. They're both impressions I can't quite judge the accuracy of because I can only compare them with other impressions I have seen (Bill Murray and John Candy have previously done Richard Burton for example and Ryan Stiles has done Carol Channing on “Whose Line”) but every impression here feels very lived in. Alecs’ role suits him well and Wiig disappears into her role in a way I don't think I've seen her do anywhere before or since. Even Casey Wilson plays a woman who gets little chance to prove herself with no lines (and she looked damn good doing it too).

• Someone on an old message board (possibly S-N-L.com?) pointed out how these may have become the new Celebrity Jeopardy of its era with Haders’ Price serving the Ferrell/Trebek role and Armisens’ Liberace as the Hammond/Connery role. You can definitely see that here.

• The misplaced hand gag played extremely well (especially near the end) and this iteration may have hit just the right amount of raunch before they reach their tipping point.

1. Halloween Special 1959 - Jon Hamm/Coldplay (10.25.2008)

• This is probably the most famous of these sketches due to it's frequent inclusion in modern Halloween Special compilations (and airing during a strong period for the show I'm general). The gag with the malfunctioning scissor lift played very well and was funny.

• Fun fact: Jon Hamm was originally going to play Dean Martin in dress rehearsal but was able to adeptly switch into James Mason in moments notice. Nonetheless, Hamm is a great addition to these and has some of the best lines (“two old fashioneds”, “regina/vagina”).

• Fred Armisens’ Liberace makes his debut here and would become a mainstay in these sketches at this point. I've seen better Liberace impressions than Armisens (Dave Thomas’ from SCTV for one, Bruce Mahlers' from Fridays for another) but something about this role really suits him. 

• Armisen and Hamm sort of usher in the transition of Hader’s Vincent Price character into “flustered straight man who has completely lost control of his own show to these three drunken, oversized lowkey degenerates.”

• I can't really gauge the accuracy of a Gloria Swanson impression but we start to see some “late era Wiig hamminess” creep in here even though she's fairly restrained with few lines in this one.

• Since John Mulaney has joined the writing staff this season, this is officially the first Vincent Price sketch he has written on (wonder who wrote the first two though?) It makes sense that Mulaney would bring these back just as a way to get Hader on the show more since the first two were so solid. Plus, this one feels tightened up quite a bit and it has a lot more energy than the first two. Maybe Mulaney had a better sense of how to make these play live?

Closing Updates

• The next episode of “We Heart Hader” should be out two weeks from now. It will be all about Bills’ guest appearances as Tom McDougal on the first two seasons of “The Mindy Project”. 

• As of this writing, my next blog post is going to be a full length review if the Shane Gillis/Tate McRae episode of SNL airing March 1st. My review of it should be posted on this blog by late in the evening on Sunday, March 2nd.

• Ok, I didn't think Shane's last episode was the worst one ever, but is still a pretty poor and disappointing choice for the first episode back after the outstanding 50th anniversary special.

• I mean, I get that with the Oscar's taking place on Sunday, March 2nd not a lot of A-list actors or Hollywood talent are going to be available that week, but surely there must be better comedians or even other former SNL alumni available? Hmm?

• Oh well. See you a week from Sunday! Take care, everybody!