An Oval Office – President Jimmy Carter (Aykroyd) bids a
tearful farewell to his friend and associate then White House Budget Director
Bert Lance (Belushi) who is forced to resign, despite not being all that
corrupt apparently. Belushi addresses the camera directly and turns this into
an advertisement for the “National Express” card (“Don’t leave office without
it”). At the end, Belushi and Aykroyd have the exchange “well, I guess there’s
nothing else left to say” “except LFNY…”. Belushi was obviously pretty coked up
here given how much he was visibly sweating. Given the political nature of this
piece, it obviously dates itself quite a bit. You may have to be a little more
familiar with whatever Lance was involved with at the time to really get it,
especially with a line I liked just out of context where Aykroyd says “you
certainly did nothing illegal, and probably nothing unethical, and only a few
things that were really sleazy”. Also, I never really got why these “American
Express” as parodies got the huge audience reaction that they did (this and the
one from the first season with Garrett as Rubin “Hurricane” Carter come to
mind). Maybe that’s because I’m only familiar with those ads via parodies. They
must have been memorable or long-running for even “In Living Color” to still be
doing those more than 15 years later. They even had Shawn Wayans as Chris Rock
once advertising the “Anonymous Express” card (“Don’t be the ‘only’ black cast
member on an all-white show without it.”) Overall, it was a reasonably well
written political piece if you were familiar enough with it, but this fake ad
felt kind of awkwardly tacked on to the cold open spot. It might have played
better right after the monologue just cut off after Lance’s name is spelled out
across a suddenly voided card (another bit I liked). C+
Montage #1 – This would be the first of about three or four
new opening montages for this season. It is just a long shot of a big
Jumbo-Tron screen in Times Square where the guests and cast of the show are
displayed and pixelated likenesses of the casts are shown with a real
transparent inset of their faces in the center. This was probably the most
awkward intro this whole season. Belushi and Murray’s pixel likenesses were
particularly goofy looking.
Monologue – Martin comes out and sings an acapella rendition
of “Mac the Knife”…repeating just the first verse over and over. The band is a
little late on their cue…just before Martin decides to quit singing. He then
jokes about his loafers and his policy on buying and selling houses to stay in
(and raising families) in the cities where he’s on tour. Martin then quickly
plugs his “Let’s Get Small” album and mentions some other TV programs he’ll be
on to promote it like “Bowling For Dollars” and “Celebrity Cokeheads” just before
doing a little “tootski” off his Chap stick. Steve then mentions his
disappointment with Farrah Fawcett-Majors for not calling him “after all the
time I spent holding up her poster with one hand.” Steve ends with a
groan-inducing pun-heavy routine about searching for tiny cat handcuffs after
finding out his cat was embezzling his money after seeing thousands of dollars’
worth of cat toys around his house. This was definitely Steve’s weakest
monologue of his three hosting stints this season. C+
Royal Deluxe II – A filmed fake ad for the luxury car with
such a smooth ride, a rabbi is able to perform a perfect circumcision in the
back seat. This is a rather well known classic among in the pantheon of SNL’s
commercial parodies. It got big laughs form the audience. Aykroyd played a
perfect straight deadpan pitchman amid such absurdity. B+
Festrunk Brothers – Czech brothers Georg (Martin) and Yortuk
(Aykroyd) make their first ever SNL appearance. They meet up with a couple of
girls in the laundry room of their singles’ apartment building (Radner, Curtin)
engaged in a ping pong match. The brothers tell the girls all about their
escape from Czechoslovakia as they mangle American idioms and pick up lines.
The girls try to convince them they will meet them at the Holland tunnel. Steve
and Dan were obviously doing early, undeveloped versions of the Czech
characters as evidenced by their delivery and their absence of loud hats and
flashy chains. Also, Steve’s famous line “we are two wild and crazy guys” is delivered
casually at the beginning of the sketch as opposed to being the big finish.
This sketch pales in comparison to the installments from Steve’s later hosting
stints, but I did laugh at their one legged disco dancing and Martin smashing
the ping pong ball with his paddle and declaring himself the winner. B-
Weekend Update w/Curtin and Aykroyd – Best jokes: 3rd degree
burns, Onassis settlement, Emergency Sysytem Test for Hard of Hearing. Laraine
reports on her month long trip to China for Roshshashanah which took place
during the Mao Tse-Tung funeral. She brings out her souvenir which is a
snowglobe recreation of Chairman Mao’s tomb. Nice brief sight gag, but set up
could’ve been trimmed a little. The party animal Bill Murray reviews “The
Deep”. He didn’t see it because his date was drunk and they arrived too late.
Everyone tells him Jaclyn Bisset looked great, but he runs a brief clip. Murray
mostly criticizes Nolte’s performance. Mainly, he pokes fun at his accent and
says he looks like “a Denver cop” with a mustache. Murray’s bit was too short
to really go anywhere. He has done better movie reviews. Murray throws it to
Garrett at the sports desk. Garrett comments on the upcoming Ali/Shavers fight
and (in a cheap photo gag) notes Ernie Shavers having his brain knocked through
his helmet by a sparring partner as a handicap. Garrett then comments on
Japanese baseball. He shows a speech of the Japanese players’ speech subtitled
so that he claims he’s “the luckiest non-Negro on the face of the earth” as he is
not a great athlete. The speech clip was definitely the highlight of Garrett’s
report. Belushi reports on his recent Durango, Mexico trip to award a $2500
Weekend Update journalism “scholarship” to 18-year old Carlos Santangelo. His
photos illustrate that he ended up buying $2500 worth of weed. This felt a
little predictable, but it was still funny. Belushi would obviously have much
better Update appearances, but I did like the photo of him holding a garbage
bag full of marijuana. At the end, Curtin and Aykroyd report on a story
involving Bert Lance, Roberto Clemente, polar bears and sex as multiple
corrections come in. That was kind of forgettable and all over the place. Also,
a couple of notes on this Update. It begins and ends with the whole cast in their
news anchor suits crowded around the desk and making banter. As Curtin and
Aykroyd deliver jokes, the accompanying pictures behind them take up the whole
screen as they appear to be behind a blue Chroma key projection. That did look
pretty awkward and I’m glad they would change it later in the season. Anyway, I
liked that this Update utilized the entire cast as themselves. I also enjoyed
how light and fast paced it was. This is something current Update could take
notes from. B-
Mike McMack, Defense Lawyer – McMack (Martin) is defending
Morris against Ms. Kazurski (Radner) in a rape case. His rather innocuous case
implies Radner is a cheap tramp who was asking for it. He gets her to confess
to answering the door from the bath in a flimsy neglige and having sex 38 times
in the past six years. She also helped register blacks to vote. The prosecutor
(Murray) objects to McMack’s line of questioning and is overruled. Radner is
too emotionally distraught to continue, so Murray moves for a recess. During
the recess, Murray congratulates McMack on a job well done and boldly asks Ms.
Karurski out. She makes him question whether he’s lost his way to which he
replies “Naaaah!” This sure felt like a cross between “Thedoric of York”
(especially the ending) and Kevin Nealon’s “Frank Gannon P.I. P.I – Politically
Incorrect Private Investigator”. The highlights were the ending and Martin
describing Radner getting out of the shower to the jury. It was a little slow
in the beginning and maybe Martin and Radner played it too big in some spots,
but a fine sketch otherwise. B-
Keypunch Confessional – Morris confesses adultery and acting
to murder to Aykroyd who punches his sins into the Trinity 3000 CPU containing
a linkup to Rome assisting the priests in penance. He also uses the CPU to
order plane tickets as Morris also confesses the dead father’s son is after him
and he needs a place to stay. This is another sketch that might seem dated
today, but the audience seemed to like it. I did get a kick out of how Aykroyd
seamlessly transitioned from sins to travel arrangements and how 10 hail marrys
were autonomously spit out amid loud beeping. Otherwise, it was well performed.
C+
Beatles Second Offer – This is a repeat segment from the
Buck Henry/Gordon Lightfoot episode (5/22/1976) and I don’t know why it’s on
this episode on DVD. Anyway, in case no one else reviewed it. Lorne is in his
office trying to convince the fab four to appear on this show. He increases his
offer to $3200 and Don Pardo informs them of their accommodations. There was
nothing much here but a straight forwards desk piece that would become a better
running gag in the second season. Since they got Harrison, they had
discontinued the gag by this season already. C+
Great Moments in Rock and Roll – Rock Aficionado Alice Sloan
(Newman) tells us how she got a hold of the famous shades of Roy Orbison
(Belushi) whom she was dating at the time. The shades are noted as one of his
two famous traits. The other obviously being how he always stands perfectly
still while singing. We join the scene as Orbison’s manager is convincing him
to break up with Alice right before he leaves for Memphis as he gives her his
own personal shades. Just then he debuts the new song he just wrote for her,
“Pretty Woman.” This was a rather slow sketch that went on a bit too long. I
did like Belushi’s Orbison impression, though. The real highlights were him
falling down during the performance and Murray having to prop him up and point
the mic stand down on the ground. B+
Franken and Davis – Al and Tom open with a rendition of
“Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off” with the word “Chicano”. Then, they introduce
Jane as someone who will be playing Anita Bryant in tonight’s sketch. Jane says
the role was a challenge as they were once ex-lovers (an obvious reference to
Anita coming out of the closet in the past year). Al sets up the premise of
their sketch as a male “Mr. USA Pageant” of which Anita Bryant is host. Mr.
California Brad Gutner (Tom) and Mr. Arkansas Lyle Cadonia (Al). For the talent
competition, Al does some football drills to “High Hopes” and Tom does an
avant-garde interpretive dance. Last year’s Mr. Galaxy winner Craig Rasmussen
(Martin) makes his farewell appearance as Mr. Arkansas is announced as the
winner. This was possibly the funniest sketch of the night. I liked the
slightly dark anachronistic feel of it and how vastly different Al and Tom’s
characters were portrayed. Franken was very funny here going on about speech
therapy in his Southern Accent and being asked if Jews control too much wealth
in America. I also liked how smoking marijuana or having sex disqualified
someone. B+
Kromega III – A filmed fake ad for the watch that takes
three hands to operate for all the lights and precise time functions. The
rather grim tone of this made it funny, but it seems kind of silly in this age
of smartphones and iPads. I liked the tagline “It’s like asking a stranger for
the time.” B-
Well, this was a rather forgettable season opener, but
that’s nothing new for SNL. Next episode is Taj Mahal w/Madeline Kahn.
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