Paraquat Cold Open – Belushi and Radner are Mexican farmers
harvesting their marijuana crops as they are being crop dusted with Paraquat.
They talk about how it might cause severe lung damage. Aykroyd narrates how
this marijuana was trafficked from Mexico to New York by mule, seized plane,
seized bus and a Georgia where a jazz musician takes it back to New York and
lets Murray take a hit off his joint as he opens the show. This was an all
right cold open, but it seemed like it didn’t really have a point or that they
didn’t have enough to say about the paraquat controversy. Aykroyd did most of
the heavy lifting here and he was just narrating. Watching Murray toke just
wasn’t inherently funny in itself. Hopefully, there will be a call back to this
later in the show. Maybe you would’ve had to have been more familiar with the
whole paraquat story at the time to get it. C+
Monologue – Dreyfuss takes the stage wearing a Hamlet costume
and holding his Oscar. He explains that “a certain cast member” (who is
obviously revealed to be Belushi) convinced him that since they don’t get a lot
of Oscar winning hosts, people are going to want to see his acting chops,
particularly because he thought Richard Burton was more deserving of the Oscar
because he was great in Hamlet. So, to begrudgingly prove his worth Dreyfus is
badgered into performing the famous “to be or not to be” soliloquy only to be
“helped” by Belushi who comes on stage uninvited. Belushi simply gives Dreyfus
his line because he thought he forgot his line, but Dreyfus states that he was
merely attempting a “dramatic pause”. Belushi chews him out for his
performances and for his accepting the Oscar which he promptly grabs from Dreyfus
as he punches him in the gut. This was a great monologue and John was fantastic
here. I particularly liked his line about how Richard Burton “takes one drink
and Hollywood blackballs him”, his line about having to work hard to keep his
family in clothes and drugs and his line about how George C. Scott and Marlon
Brando didn’t even accept their Oscars saying “you could’ve sent an Indian…BUT
NOOOOOO”. B+
Cone Encounters Of The Third Kind – Dreyfuss reprises his
role as Roy Neary from “Close Encounters”. The sketch opens with him building
his hill as Walter Cronkite (Murray) drones on in the background. He tries to
convince his relatives of his alien sighting when Beldarr’s driving school
commercial airs. Meanwhile, Beldarr (Aykroyd) informs his family that the high
master of Remulak, Kuldroth (Belushi) is coming to earth to inspect the star
cruiser refueling station they were sent here to build…which they haven’t even
started yet. Roy Neary has suddenly caught up with them asking for answers as
the high master lands on earth with his lackey Merkon (Morris). Prymatt
(Curtin) makes up some lie about not wanting to complete all of the refueling
structures until the human attendant they hired has been properly train and
name Roy as that attendant on the spot. This is a position he is happy to
accept. Even though it doesn’t seem like you have to be all that familiar with
the film to enjoy this sketch, it was a clever way to work in a cheap parody of
one of Dreyfuss’ previous hit films. I especially liked the reveal of the
complete lack of progress of the plan the Coneheads were sent here for as well
as Dreyfuss suddenly adopting the Conehead’s high pitched clipped tone of
voice. B-
Sex Test – Dreyfuss administers this quiz on sexual health
and performances with expert advice and analysis from the likes of UCLA
professor Dr. Candace Bightman (Newman), Penthouse sociologist Dr. Judd Quimson
(Murray), primate expert Dr. Francine Shoes (Radner), and author Dr. Herbert
Rice (Morris). This was very well written and acted. I especially liked
Drefyuss’ line about how your kids will be just as screwed up as you if you ask
them to leave, the statement that George Washington Carver discovered
genitalia, the line “you selfish pork face, now I’ll never be satisfied” and
Murray’s sweaty besunglassed performance. B-
Weekend Update w/ Curtin and Aykroyd – Best jokes: Kierke
Guard, McDonalds. Jane opens by addressing some letters she got in regards to
her “bitchy” demeanor and how she would lose it and shout at guests like
Litella, Belushi, Roseannedanna, etc. and states that she will try to be calmer
and more professional from now on. This wasn’t funny on its own, but it just
set up a mini runner for tonight’s Update. I liked her “feeble” line and the
one about her mother having legionaries’ disease and Dan’s quick menopause jab.
Murray gives another “stargazing” review acknowledging how bad his Oscar
predictions were and how disappointed he was to see tonight’s host win. When he
heard this, he ordered a clip from Warner Bros. of “The Goodbye Girl” which
turns out to be Belushi and Radner reenacting the Richard Dreyfuss/Marsha Mason
scenes form the film. Even Murray agrees he doesn’t deserve the Oscar because
he essentially plays every role the same. The film clip was great. Belushi did
an excellent impersonation of Dreyfus. He even had his voice, cadence and
facial expressions down perfectly. I also liked Murray’s line saying how fat he
had gotten. Roseanne Roseannadanna (Radner) returns to deliver a commentary on
the existence of UFOs. This turns into her telling a story of going for a drive
and happening upon a buttocks heavy sex scene in a drive in showing of “Le Sex
Shoppe”. Suddenly, she starts talking about Jane’s eye boogers, her tiny blonde
mustache and asks whether her breasts are the same size to which she rips open
her blouse (again) and screeches for Roseanne to “check for herself” and then
apologizes for sinking to this level once again. That was the culmination of
this weeks’ Update runner. This may have been the shortest Roseanne
Roseannadanna commentary of the whole season, but it was in the running for the
best in terms of straying from the typical format and dialogue. B+
Nick Springs – Lounge Singer Nick (Murray) is performing at
“the honeymoon room” at the Poconos Springs (citation needed…he kinda rushed
through that name) Guests include poision ivy stricken newlyweds Bill and Jona
Shomer (Belushi, Radner) and industry guy Jeff Greenspoon (Dreyfus) and his
mistress Mrs. Liebowitz. It’s interesting how in all the Nick sketches Newman
was either playing someone’s mistress or someone who would just rather not talk
to Nick in the crowd. Nick introduces Schaffer as himself within the sketch.
Groundskeeper Jimmy Joe Red Sky (Aykroyd) tells the guests what they can do
outside and shows us a dead squirrel he pulls out of the pool. It’s also
strange how Aykroyd’s role changes in each sketch. Nick closes the sketch by
singing a rendition of the “Close Encounters” theme much like he sang the “Star
Wars” theme. This was a rather forgettable Nick sketch, but I did like the
increasing up tempo drum machine and his screaming rendition of “Love To Love
You Baby”. C+
Pet Peeves – Newman and Dreyfus come home and argue about
the little things that bug each other like salad pimentos and an affinity for
simple things in life over exploring other big concepts along with other things
that she hates to hear over reruns of “The Honeymooners” and “The Odd Couple”.
This felt more like a laundry list of petty annoyances and vitriol than a real
sketch at times. The dialogue seemed really pretentious in this early on, but
it was still pretty entertaining for your typical Marylinn Suzanne Miller
sketch. Newman and Dreyfuss’ performances really added something, though. B+
David Susskind – Susskind (Murray) hosts this mother’s day
edition of his talk show where all of his guests bought their mothers along.
Guests include Henry and Chi Chi Kissinger (Belushi, Newman), Leon and Toots
Spinks (Morris, Radner) and of course Tom and Emma Lou Snyder (Aykroyd, Curtin).
Radner with an afro and blacked out teeth (saying she “flossed too hard”) was
kind of funny, but Aykroyd and Curtin really stole this sketch. Curtin did a
very funny imitation of Aykroyd’s Snyder and the audience really responded well
to it. I also liked Murray’s line about his next guests being “six teenage
prostitutes and their congressmen”. B+
How To Pay For Your Sins – Don Novello Makes his first ever
SNL appearance as Father Guido Sarducci whom Dreyfuss introduces as “his
spiritual advisor” and gossip columnist/rock critic as we’ve all heard. He
appears on crutches which he attributes to a motorcycle accident in Vatican
City, but in reality is due to an injury he suffered in the Hockey Penalty Box
sketch from the Michael Sarrazin episode. I liked his lines about Jesus’s
younger brother Billy Christ and fines for sins, but I’d agree that this a bit
forgettable overall and Father Sarducci’s best appearances are just ahead of
him. C+
I Want To Be Seduced – This wasn’t much except a straight
musical performance from Dreyfus singing a song his friend Gary Tigerman wrote
for him. Dreyfus doesn’t have a bad voice at all.
Goodnights – The other runner from tonight’s show was how we
would hear the Jaws theme when Dreyfuss introduced both musical guests. This
culminated in Dreyfuss being “eaten” by the old shark head. For some reason,
Chevy didn’t make an appearance.
Well, this was a fine episode. Dreyfuss proved to be an
outstanding host who should’ve come back in subsequent years. Next episode is
Buck Henry with Sun Ra/
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